My body was a battleground for many years. Like so many of us, I grew up disconnected from my instincts and deep knowing. Without adequate emotional bonding in my early years, I learned to disconnect from parts of myself that went unseen. What came online was the nice, good girl—adapting, complying, performing—with a critical voice attacking whatever threatened to break through this facade. The result was free-roaming anxiety and a sense that something was missing, though I didn't know what it was.

Talk therapy helped me understand my patterns, but something was still missing. Everything shifted when I discovered somatic shadow work. Shadow is the doorway to the Real—the opposite of shallow. The parts of myself I'd learned to hide didn't disappear; they were held in my body, waiting to be seen, accepted, and integrated.

When my coach asked, "How do you know you're feeling anxiety?" I paused and had to actually feel to find the answer. I could hold and listen to this anxious part instead of being possessed by it. That moment changed everything.

I learned that this anxious part was like a manager rushing around, attempting to control my external environment and putting out internal flare-ups. It was terrified I would fall apart if it stopped. I could see how hard it had been working—and how much it feared judgment if those parts were seen. It had stepped in when no one else was there, managing what I couldn't yet meet: the parts carrying grief, shame, and anger—the vulnerable parts asking for attention.

Rather than being possessed by this guardian or suppressing its signal, I learned to stay present with and curious about it—to befriend the fear it carried. It became a portal, guiding me to the archetypal patterns and exiled parts that had been waiting in the shadow. Through this work, I've been becoming their embodied host, the loving container—and in that turning toward, I've found strength, resilience, and a flexibility I'd never known.

I began learning to let the parts of me that were never hurt speak—not just for me, but from me. I began developing trust in my body's natural intelligence—the same intelligence that moves through all of nature—feeling more resonance between body and mind, becoming more of my whole self. This radical shift required genuine love, compassion, and humility. When I could meet my responses with curiosity rather than control, they gradually softened. Energy that had been bound in protection and management became available for creativity, true connection, presence, and play.

This inner work has transformed my relationships—with my husband and partner of over 30 years (for years I was projecting my own needs, wounds, and weaknesses onto him without realizing it—learning to see and own my projections, to take responsibility for what's actually mine, has been humbling and one of my greatest teachers. It's also allowed me to see his humanness, to actually meet who he is rather than who I needed him to be, and to feel authentic compassion for some of the first times), with my two children who are now young adults at 19 and 23, with my friends, and most fundamentally, with myself.

These days you'll find me at the pottery studio throwing bowls and mugs (they're starting to crowd my shelves!), watercoloring alongside my journal writing, hiking the trails near my home, tending my garden where I grow medicinal plants like echinacea, bergamot, and heal-all to make tinctures, or in the company of my two kittens and two dogs. I've always loved working with my hands—making things. I used to have a business designing clothes and handbags. Now the creative impulse shows up in clay, color, medicine-making, and the slow practice of tending to what wants to emerge.

Our bodies contain everything we need to process and integrate wounded or stuck places, providing rich compost for our meaningful path. Now I work with people ready to reclaim their embodied wisdom and authentic power. Through somatic practices and shadow integration, we discover that our bodies are exquisite guides rather than enemies, and our struggles become allies revealing our spiritual gold.

My Story